The last three years have been some of the most challenging for me personally. I’ve asked “why” knowing I likely will not understand, even if I got that answer. As a family, we faced diagnosis, difficulty, and betrayal. We experienced narcissism and deception. I questioned the behavior and motives of those who intended harm. I check my own heart and responses. I prayed for my enemies, my family, and myself. I forgive. And forgive again.
I faced anger and hurt and injustice. I have cried, a lot. I wait for comfort, knowing God will bring comfort so that we can comfort others.
I asked for things that seemed, in my human understanding, like the logical conclusion. I asked for what I believed was according to God’s will. I brought my supplications to Him. I gave him the trials. I asked what He would have me do and say. I obeyed. Not perfectly, of course. God knows our hearts.
With God’s help, I stepped out of fear many times. I had to walk in faith. I had to trust. I learned when to speak up. I had to keep going forward without knowing when the trials would end. I had to trust others, and live with the disappointment when trust is broken. I had to remember that injustice is part of this world.
Through all of it, what’s still left is GRACE. He gives grace to get through. He gives grace to show us what we must empty from ourselves. Grace to forgive, Grace to keep giving and trusting, Grace to share what we have and know with others. And grace to see the beauty from ashes.
There’s still ashes, there’s still disappointments from humanity that cuts deeply. There is still loss and pain. There is still unmet expectations and unanswered questions.
But there is still grace that is greater. God is still present. God is still here to cast our burdens on. And his mercies are renewed.
The Mom Job 24/7 